Warrant

What's black and white and red all over? A yeshiva bachur on his first date. Don't ask me why that came out of my brain. I have no answer for you. 

So, this week has been seven days. And that's all I can say about it, because I can't really remember what happened. I mean, I can recall certain things, but that's about it. EOOPS, you see. (The "e" is silent.)

So let's begin from last week, where we left off after Shana Rishona's wedding. Naturally, after the wedding comes the sheva brachos. So, I went to one of her sheva brachos, the one in Bayit Vegan, home of all the Frenchies. 

It was such a beautiful simcha, and the food was insane. The speeches were hilarious and so perfect for Shana Rishona. And it was so nice to see her all married and stuff. 

At the sheva brachos, I asked one of the host's daughters for a beige dress. No, I didn't know this daughter. Never met her before in my life, actually. But I needed a dress for She-She's wedding, so I asked random peeps. And she had one, actually. So, it pays off to ask random people random things. 

And then Shabbos was in Ramois with the in-laws. We were actually supposed to go somewhere else for Shabbos, but my in-laws were maybe gonna have some sem girls, and they wanted to know if I would come and hock it up with them. But they didn't end up coming, and it was just the four of us, and it was such a nice Shabbos. I'm really buds with my mother-in-law. Well, that's what I say. And I'm always right, you know. 

And then, on motzei Shabbos, we heard the phone ring. So you know that's either really bad or really good news. Well, in this case, it was good. Adina, my sister-in-law (no, not the Mother Wogerlanter--I spelled it wrong on purpose, just 'cause I wanna), had a baby boy. Woohoo! So the bris is tomorrow, and we're going. So many excitings. 

And then on Sunday, Mikvah-Jumper Avigayil and I went around Yerushalayim. We went to the mir--no not to break in again--just to see it. I think Avigayil was close to tears. We were definitely having some major freak-outs. And then we saw the "Next to the Mir" sefarim store, and there were some more almost tears. 

We had such a good time, checking out all the clothing stores and meuchedets around. 

And then the rest of the week happened. I worked a lot and annoyed most of the HRs of the corporate world. They probably have a warrant out on this annoying person named Hudi who has this squeaky phone voice. I'm really good at bothering people. Me: "Hi, this is Hudi. Can I please speak to HR?" 

The secretary, who's always this polite, Southern-sounding lady, even when she's literally from Alaska, always says, "She's not available right now. Can I take message?" Which really translates to: "NO, YOU ANNOYING HUMAN BEAN. THIS IS THE TWELFTH TIME YOU HAVE CALLED IN TWO MINUTES. YES, YOU'VE PROVEN THAT'S POSSIBLE. AND WE DON'T WANT TO SPEAK TO YOU." 

Anywho, this week was the CH's birfday, and he turned 92. So many funs. We had a good time, going out and celebrating. 

Also, the CH was talking about a random person being "tone death"--because this person killed every song he/she sang. I thought that was highly funny. 

What else? Oh, I finished the thank you letters. The worstest thing about marrying an Israeli is that you have to write all of the thank you notes yourself. My hand might never be the same. 

And I finally sighed up for Ulpan. 

So, many things have happened, and I'm sure will continue to happen, because life continues to happen, and so things just go on as life goes on...I'm sorry that the universe has to deal with that sentence even existing. 

Toodles from Hoodles!