Smoothie

One hundred bottles of beer on the wall, one hundred bottles of beer. Take one down, pass it around, 99 bottles of beer on the wall. 

So, I sat down to write some coherent, intelligent words, and that's what came out of my sleep-addled brain. We don't question. We just accept. 

I'll begin with a story: Once upon a time, there was a shark. Her name was Charlotte Hobbes. She decided to start going to school (in the ocean, there are many schools of fish). It was called "The Most Difficult School in Existence." Now, Charlotte was naive—in nicer words, she was downright stupid—and so she thought that this school would be easy and fun. But she was wrong. 

The end. 

What a beautiful story. I think I should send it to a publisher. Would probably make millions, and then I could quit school! Ah, what a life. 

What's new? "Well, this suit was until I walked in." That was a quote from something unholy. המבין יבין. 

In all seriousness, I'm doing fabulously well. I'm most definitely not bored. When I'm not in class, I'm doing homework. And when I'm not doing homework, I'm working in the chug. And when I'm not working in the chug, I'm crying about the homework that I have that I should be doing but I'm not because I have too much of it and I'm stressed and I need chocolate twizzlers but I only have one bag and I'm saving it for midterms which are this Friday but also next Friday and then what about finals...sorry about that brain spasm. 

So, like I said, definitely have many muches of things to do. But this is good. I'd much rather be busy than bored. Speaking of bored, I played such a fun board game on Shabbos. I forget the name, because I'm old, but it was fitting different blocks into a star. I don't know how to describe it so well. Just know that it was fun. It was a similar concept to Qbitz. 

Even the games I play are mathy games. What have I become? It's scary. I always have math on the brain. I made up something called OPS(old people syndrome), and when someone this Shabbos asked me what OPS stood for, I said operating systems. Do you see the problem here? 

In other news, it's starting to get cold here in the Holy Land. I took out the black tights and sweaters. It's real. Still not much rain, but definitely getting chilly. 

On Thursday, I went to a bris of random people who I'd never met before. The mom was a cousin of my friend, who asked me to man the zoom for the bris. So I went, because I wanted a free meal, and also because it's a mitzva. 

And then after the bris, I went to Geula to shop for wedding gifts for my friend who's moving to Israel with her husband next week. 

And then, after shopping, I went to kotel. On the way there, the bus goes through some Arab neighborhoods. We were stuck in traffic for a good half-hour there, and some boys threw a smoothie at the bus. Maybe they thought it needed to be cleaned. So that was an adventure. Always wanted to get a smoothie thrown at me. Maybe it was blueberry and strawberry. Looked kind of purple. 

But the kotel was so nice, Baruch Hashem. Walked through the old city on the way back. Didn't see anyone who I knew. And then I went away for Shabbos on Thursday night. 

Shabbos was really nice. We had a cute Richmond shabbaton—with all three of us—in Ramat Beit Shemesh at the Steins. They truly are saints. Who

else would voluntarily invite three crazy girls into their apartment for an entire weekend? 

It was such a great Shabbos. I didn't get very much sleep, though. I guess that's the problem with hanging out with people you actually like and want to talk to. How annoying. 

We had many heated, controversial debates—friendly, of course—over delicious food, played some taboo, fiddled with and fought over fidgets, got some brachos from the birthday girl, Nancy, and spoke some Hebrew. It was quite entertaining. Hope to do it again sometime. 

Anywho, I need to go buy a menorah and some oil. I don't know why I didn't keep mine from last year. That would have been smart of me. Oh, well. That's life. What's life. A box of cereal. How much does it cost? Too much, let me tell you.

Cereal is expensive, and I eat it every day for breakfast. Okay, fine, maybe for lunch too. Fine, you got me, also for dinner. So I guess buying two boxes a week adds up. Just kidding. I only eat a bowl a day, usually for breakfast. But it's like 15 shekel. So mean. 

That was a tangent that wasn't meant to happen. I feel like that happens a lot on this blog. I literally get whiplash from writing it. 

I think that's all for today. I'm getting this one out early. Don't expect this to happen again. 

Miss you all.

Toodles from Hoodles!